Wellness Journey: 2024!
Okay! Let's try this again!!
I've come to the realization that this is wellness journey really is a marathon; not a sprint. After reflecting on my previous wellness post, I have since struggled with showing up consistently. Although, there has been some growth in every area of my wellness journey, I am not quite where I'd like to be. Over the past year, I have lacked accountability majorly which has interrupted my growth process.
Last year, I shared my goals here, on this blog, but not with many who are close to me. The fact that I thought that I could be disciplined enough to do this on my own while being vulnerable by sharing my journey with you (my virtual family), makes me chuckle. Imposter syndrome is REALER than real and I have been a victim of it for far too long. Opening up about my flaws and imperfections throughout this journey is tougher than most people think. Especially since I'm an introvert. I'd much rather spill my guts out within the pages of my prayer journal where I know its safe and confidential. There's no judgment when I fall short; there's no competition or comparison to where others are on their journey.
With most of my social media audience following me for my modeling work, showing up as Ashley, the woman of God, wife and mom, has been a challenge. Being a part of such a glamourized industry, I sometimes put unnecessary pressure on myself to show up "at my best", beautified and glammed up. Truth is, your girl is worn out on most days from chasing little ones around non stop. These days, my BTS footage consists of me, makeup free, hair a mess, changing diapers, scrubbing marker off of the walls and picking up toys. There is no "picture perfect" moment that exists right now. "At my best" for me in this season means, showing up for myself and for my family. In order to do that, I must remain consistent with sitting in the presence of the Lord, reading the Bible and praying for guidance throughout the day.
This year I vow to do better. I'm forcing myself out of my shell, showing up as MYSELF. Hang in there with me though as I go through this journey of growth. It's going to take some time.
Happy New Year!!
Be Blesssed,
Ashley
